Do affairs that break up a marriage last?


Do affairs that break up a marriage last? hope to find the answer here

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  1. Affairs don’t necessarily lead to divorce, but they certainly make it easier. In fact, studies show that affairs are one of the leading causes of divorce among married couples.

    So, if you’re looking to save your marriage, you may want to consider getting help from a professional counselor. A licensed therapist can provide support and guidance as you work toward repairing your relationship.

    If you decide to pursue counseling, remember that it’s important to keep your sessions confidential. Your spouse might not appreciate knowing about your affair, especially if he or she suspects that you’re cheating. And if you’re already seeing a counselor, don’t tell your spouse about it until you’ve had time to discuss your situation and come up with a plan for moving forward.

    Your counselor should also be able to give you tips on how to avoid future infidelities. For example, you could set ground rules for yourself that prohibit you from spending time alone with certain individuals. Or you could agree to talk to your partner every day.

    You may also benefit from taking steps to prevent cheating in the first place. That includes setting boundaries in your personal relationships. For instance, if you’ve noticed that your husband seems to spend more time at his office than usual, ask him why. Perhaps he needs to take longer breaks during the week because he’s working late on weekends. If you suspect that your wife is keeping secrets from you, encourage her to share them with you.

    Finally, if you’d like to learn more about ways to repair a broken marriage, check out my book, How to Get Over Someone Without Getting Even.

    The Study

    This study was conducted by Dr. John Gottman at The University of Washington School of Medicine. He studied couples who were married between 2 months and 20 years. His findings showed that there are five stages of a relationship breakup.

    Stage 1: The honeymoon stage lasts only two weeks. During this period, the couple is excited about being together and spends most of their time together. They’re happy and satisfied with each other.

    Stage 2: This stage lasts three to six months. At this point, the couple begins to notice problems in their relationship. They may argue over small things, such as whether to go out to eat or stay home. But they still love each other very much.

    Stage 3: This stage lasts nine to 12 months. During this phase, the couple fights frequently. They may yell at each other, slam doors, throw dishes, and threaten divorce. They may be physically violent toward each other. However, they still care deeply about each other.

    Stage 4: This stage lasts 18 to 24 months. At this point the couple is no longer fighting. They’ve stopped arguing and are now living separately. They may not talk to each other anymore, but they still care about each other.

    Finally, Stage 5: This stage lasts 30+ months. After this long, the couple finally divorces.

    If you’re currently going through a separation or divorce, you may find these stages helpful.

    Why it Matters

    If you’re married, you’ve probably heard the saying “it takes two to tango.” Well, it turns out that this saying is true when it comes to divorce too!

    Divorce is expensive, emotionally draining, and often messy. But there are ways to minimize the damage and keep things running smoothly. Here are some tips to help you avoid a nasty breakup:


    When you’re married, there’s no question that affairs can be devastating. They may cause irreparable damage to your relationship and leave you feeling betrayed. But when you’re single, affairs aren’t nearly as bad.

    That’s because most affairs end quickly and quietly. Affairs are usually over within weeks or months. And most affairs happen outside of relationships. So, affairs are not nearly as damaging to your life as marriages.

    However, affairs can still hurt your reputation. People who find out about them often gossip about you behind your back. This hurts your chances of finding another partner.

    If you decide to stay in your current relationship, you should consider talking to your spouse about your affair. Tell him/her everything you’ve done and ask for forgiveness. Then, try to work together to repair your relationship.

    If you decide that you need to end your relationship, talk to your spouse first. Explain that you’re leaving because you feel guilty and ashamed. Ask him/her to forgive you and help you move forward.

    Then, tell your friends and family members that you’re ending your relationship. Don’t lie. Be honest. Your honesty will help you avoid rumors and gossiping.

    After you’ve told everyone, go through your belongings and give away any items that remind you of your ex. Throw away photos, letters, and other things that hold sentimental value.

    Finally, take some time to heal emotionally. Go to counseling or therapy to learn how to deal with your feelings.

    And remember: affairs are never worth losing your heart and soul over.

    Final point

    This study shows us that affairs that end marriages tend to happen early in relationships, and that’s when couples should start thinking about whether their relationship will survive.