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How do you fix a marriage without talking about it?
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It seems that every couple wants to talk about their relationship. But why not just tell them that you want to marry them instead?
This is actually one of my favourite questions because it’s a great opportunity to explain to your loved one why you want to marry them. And don’t worry, they won’t mind at all. They might even ask you why you haven’t said anything sooner.
But let me give you a little advice. When you finally decide to propose to her, don’t expect her to jump right back into your arms. She may take time to process what you’ve told her.
So, wait patiently until she says yes. That’s when you should start planning the wedding.
If you really want to surprise her, you could plan a trip somewhere far away. Or maybe you could hire a videographer to record the moment.
You can also organise a romantic dinner for two. After that, you can suggest a date night. A few nights later, you can casually mention that you’re thinking of proposing.
And don’t forget to include a ring. Even though you’re already engaged, you still need to buy her something special.
The first thing you need to know is that when you’re married, you don’t just talk to each other. You talk to yourself too.
When you’re married, you’re not only talking to your spouse, but also to yourself.
That means you need to be aware of the things you say to yourself. And you should try to change those negative self-talk patterns.
Here are some examples of common negative self-talk patterns:
• “If he doesn’t call me back today, I’m going to lose him forever!”
• “She’s never going to leave her husband.”
• “He’s never going to stop being angry at me.”
• “I’ve been trying to get pregnant for years now, and nothing ever happens.”
• “My kids are getting older, and I feel like I’m losing them.”
• “I wish I had a better job.”
• “I hate this job.”
• “This relationship isn’t working anymore.”
• “I’m not smart enough to do this.”
And the second thing you need to know…is that you should never stop talking to yourself.
If you’re married, chances are you’ve had this conversation at least once. But did you ever wonder why some couples stay together and others divorce?
There are many reasons why marriages fail, including communication problems, financial issues, infidelity, addiction, abuse, and children who grow up without a father figure.
But there’s another reason that may be just as important as any of those listed above. And that’s not talking to each other.
When we talk to ourselves, we’re communicating with our inner voice. Our inner voice is the most powerful tool we have when it comes to making decisions and solving problems.
We often use our inner voice to justify things we’d rather avoid admitting out loud. We tell ourselves lies that keep us stuck in unhealthy relationships. We rationalize bad behavior.
Our inner voice is the source of self-doubt, fear, insecurity, anxiety, depression, anger, resentment, guilt, shame, and regret.
Talking to ourselves isn’t healthy. It doesn’t help us solve problems. It keeps us stuck in unhealthy situations.
Instead, we must learn to listen to our inner voice. We must become aware of its power and learn to control it.
This is especially true when it comes to our relationship with God.
God created us with a unique ability to communicate with Him. He wants to hear from us. He wants to speak to us. He wants to guide us. He wants us to trust Him.
He wants us to ask questions. To seek His wisdom. To share our concerns. To confess our sins. To praise Him.
To pray.
So let’s start by looking at some common problems that couples face.
There are many reasons why relationships fail. Some are obvious, others not so much. But no matter the reason, there are ways to save a relationship.
Here are some examples of common problems that couples face:
• One partner doesn’t trust the other.
• The couple fights constantly.
• There’s too much drama.
• Money issues cause tension between partners.
• The couple isn’t having sex anymore.
• The couple is bored with each other.
• The partner cheats.
• The partner lies.
• The partner is selfish.
Summing up
When it comes to fixing a relationship, sometimes the best solution is to simply listen to one another.